unSpoken - Feat. Jen Elworthy
As part of this special edit of HeyFlow’s unSpoken series in collaboration with Fertility Matters at Work, we caught up with Jen Elworthy, Career & Fertility Coach and Director of Engagement at Fertility Matters at Work.
unSpoken by HeyFlow is a series of interviews about the reproductive health penalty on women’s careers. We’re on a mission to show that reproductive health isn’t just a women’s issue — it’s a business issue.
During Infertility Awareness Month, we are featuring real stories about the impact of fertility on women in the workplace.
Please introduce yourself and tell us a bit about your current role.
Jen: I'm a Career and Fertility Coach and Director of Engagement at Fertility Matters at Work. Before that, I spent 20+ years in marketing — the BBC, Hearst, News UK, Freesat, tech start-ups — working my way up to C-suite level. So when I say I went through multiple miscarriages, two ectopic pregnancies and IVF while doing it, I know exactly what that can cost you professionally. I now coach ambitious women who are in the thick of it and determined not to let it derail their careers, and I work with organisations to ensure they recognise and support all fertility journeys.
Can you share the fertility journey or fertility-related moment(s) you had to navigate while working?
Jen: Two ectopic pregnancies, a miscarriage, IVF, and the PTSD and anxiety that followed the losses. It wasn't a short story or a tidy one, and it ran alongside my career for years, quietly shaping decisions I was making at work, some of which I didn't fully understand at the time.
How did this fertility experience impact you at work at the time—professionally, emotionally, or practically?
Jen: I became a bit of a mess overnight. Before my first ectopic I was confident, clear on where I was headed, with a strong sense of my own ability. After it I was struggling with the basics like the supermarket, seeing friends, getting through a day without a panic attack. And somehow still trying to work and grow a career at the same time.
What turned it around was my mentor. She helped me figure out what work actually meant to me, and I realised that leaning into it and using it as a focus rather than hiding from it was the right call. The result was a promotion to Director of Marketing: the most senior woman in the business and part of the leadership team. That happened just as I was starting IVF. My manager and the company were incredibly supportive, and that mattered more than I can easily put into words.
What has been your greatest challenge in sustaining your career during your fertility journey?
Jen: The mental health piece, without question. The losses did something to my confidence that crept up quietly and did a lot of damage. By the time I noticed, I was operating as a much smaller version of myself, saying no to things, shrinking back, second-guessing calls I'd have made without hesitation a couple of years earlier. Rebuilding that, alongside everything else, took real effort. It wasn't automatic or easy but I did it.
When you were going through this, what was the one thing that helped you most — or what do you wish had been in place?
Jen: Talking to my manager. I was honest about what I was going through, clear that my ambition hadn't gone anywhere, and specific about what I needed, which was flexibility and trust. I didn't want to be handled carefully or quietly sidelined. I wanted to keep going, with a bit of room to breathe. Being able to say that, and have it heard and responded to, changed everything. Not everyone gets that conversation, and that's a big part of why this work matters to me. It shouldn't come down to the line manager lottery whether or not you're supported at work.
What do you believe should be the top priority for employers who want to better support employees through fertility journeys?
Jen: Culture, policy, manager training, and awareness, and all four together rather than picking one. A policy only works if people feel safe enough to use it. Managers are the pivot point because they're the ones having, or not having, the conversations that change someone's experience. And awareness matters because this stuff is mostly invisible.
At HeyFlow we help organisations remove the blindspots that stall women’s careers, feed the gender pay gap and weaken the leadership pipeline.